8 Comments

Begging for Forgiveness

“It has been a maxim with me to admit of easy reconciliation with a person whose offence proceeded from no depravity of heart; but where I was convinced it did so, to forego, for my own sake, all opportunities of revenge. I have derived no small share of happiness from this principle.” – Shenstone

“A more glorious victory cannot be gained over another man, than this, that when the injury began on his part, the kindness should begin on ours.” – Tillotson

There are times when we need to step back and look into our hearts, then look into the hearts of others and try to see where they are coming from. These are hard words to live by at times, when the blunt of their anger, justness, malicious play, etc., has its ugly head rearing in our faces.

As you try to assess the ‘damage’ to yourself and possibly others from this, reflect, write or talk through your reaction first. Walking away is not an admission of defeat.

 

 

 

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8 comments on “Begging for Forgiveness

  1. So true, my friend. I hope your life is well and you’re happy. Many Hugs, 🙂

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  2. i have an aunt who was mean to my daughter 20 years ago. Although I did try to reconcile with her, she would never admit she was at all wrong. We never could reconcile. Now, she has dementia, and forgot it even happened. I now think sometimes I should’ve tried harder. It’s the only person I ever held a long standing grudge with. I don’t know if something happened to you, but my advice is to try to resolve it especially if it’s a relative.

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    • I thank you for the advice. It is something I have always tried to avoid, but I do find that grudges do stilll seep into my life occasionally. I am sorry to hear that you were not able to resolve the issue with your aunt.

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  3. Liz, what a wonderful post. Just a few weeks ago, I had opportunity to apply this principle with some family members that stopped by the cottage we rented for a visit. I’ve held a grudge against most of my family for well over a decade, and I pushed those feelings aside, and did my best to make the visit enjoyable. It was a stark reminder to me that holding a grudge, and bearing ill feelings takes a lot more energy than it does to smile and say hello….
    Tami xo

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    • You know, Tami, that is true. A smile is easier to pass on than ill wishes and harshness. I just have to make it genuine. This is where I have to learn to really bury the hatchet. Pick my battles. xo back to you!

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  4. Hi,
    I can honestly say this is one of the hardest things to do and it is even harder when the people concerned are close to you. My own experience has taught me, and I must say, is teaching me that this is one lesson which will probably take me years to learn. I have had it happened to me and I have asked for forgiveness, even though I knew within myself that I was right. It hurt me to swallow my own self righteousness and say please forgive me, but I notice every time I have had to do it, I have set myself free and new creativity sprouts have sprung up within me. Yet, I am still learning this, Liz. Every time there is a new situation, and thank God, they don’t happen every day,week or month, I have to confront myself and see the scars, if any are there, and apply the balm of forgiveness to myself and then approach others with a forgiving spirit, no matter who was right or wrong.
    Thank you for posting this. Tillotson quotes hits deep within my soul because I have experienced this truth. It is really so, the more you step forward offering forgiveness first, the more freedom you will experience in your own life.
    Ciao,
    Patricia

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  5. Absolutely, Patricia! I think you have summed up my thoughts and feeliings within yours. It is a hard thing to look within yourself and see what the issue stems from really, and if it is your ego that needs to be tamed, correct it before it causes further complications. If it is the ego of the other(s), learning how to part with grace is a learning process for sure. Thanks for your inspiration.

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